Respect the Tourists

I do not ask politicians to respect the ordinary Lebanese citizen. He neither entrusted me with this nor have I volunteered to do it. Asking this would be insolent. The game implies keeping this citizen on some level of tension. Peace of mind calms down his fanaticism. It makes summoning him tiring and mobilizing him difficult. He must be ready, since the situation is unstable. They might need him for a demonstration, a protest, or even more. They need him to vote and pledge allegiance; to clap his hands and chant; to cut off roads.

Let’s leave the Lebanese citizen aside. Let’s leave him to his fate. He is a prisoner and isn’t allowed to choose. His function is to be the fuel of the game. He has shown a rare loyalty to his role or his fate. What I care about are the tourists. My aim is neither humanitarian nor noble. We desperately need them. Mistreating them takes them to other places. It would be scary if they left us alone. We wouldn’t find anything other than fighting and bickering to occupy us.

Since it is impossible to respect the Lebanese citizen, let’s at least respect tourists. Perhaps this would make them happy and spend, and would lead them to bring friends too. Tourists must be kept outside the chronic Lebanese disagreement. Leave them the pleasure of the beach and the joy of the mountains. Do not drag them into Lebanon’s political and sectarian ugliness. Do not speak to them of coexistence, the electoral law, and the weaving of the governmental rug. Leave them to eat tabbouli, kibbi, grilled meat, shanklish, and fruits. This is better and more honorable. Be careful not to impose Lebanese fashion upon them; divide them into the two camps; implement the Doha agreement on them; or demand to give tourists the blocking third of hotels so that they can block the season if they don’t like it.

Beware of poisoning the stay of tourists. We are in dire need for their dollars. It is why I suggest a summer truce. Let the right of making declarations be restricted to the heads of blocs and only when necessary. Let’s give rumor factories and knowledgeable sources a vacation. Let’s encourage deputies to spend summer with their electors without any speeches or declarations. They can take care of the environment or take part in picking season. Let’s stop political debates on TV. Experience has proved they contribute in pumping tensions in viewers, in addition to their role in raising the levels of fanaticism, cholesterol, diabetes, increasing the consumption of tranquilizers, and causing huge traffic jams on the way to mental asylums. Let’s pretext the feelings of tourists to prevent the live coverage of the government trust session and prevent any intervention that lasts longer than a few minutes. I know this would be unjust for the new deputies who are getting ready to train themselves on the viewers and their feelings, but this will become possible in autumn, after saving the tourism season. Do not ruin the tourist-friendly climate. Do not frighten them with random bullets every time a child is born, even if he will govern us later. Postpone the files that are a source of conflict and clashes. We will have whole decades for discussing the defensive strategy, the elimination of political sectarianism, the election laws, the right to win with the votes of other sects.

I leave the big issues and busy myself with summer and tourists. The idea of summer truce is suitable for other places. I heard an analyst call for the understanding of the pirate phenomenon in the Aden Gulf. He linked it to poverty and disenchantment. The United Nations should’ve provided those pirates with floating cooling stations, as they are playing their role in extremely difficult conditions and scorching heat. It is fine to have a summer truce. It would be a review period for sorting the gains and developing the means until activity is resumed at the beginning of the fall. The truce can be transferred to the Somali land in the blazing heat. Nothing will change. The Somalis can resume their long suicide after saying goodbye to summer. There’s no harm in carrying the summer truce to Saada and encouraging tourists to go back to Yemen. The summer truce is beneficial and revives the region’s numbers of tourists that some might be obliged to kidnap later on. Our region is hot with a severe summer. I don’t see why there is persistence to work in difficult conditions. A long summer truce may be made. Nothing will change. Tomorrow, when autumn comes, everyone can go back to the conflicts and wars that impede the establishment of states and institutions. There is no solace in our countries. Our only bet is on tourists.